E.S. Raye

I’m a little late with this week’s post–at least, later than I generally prefer. And that’s because the last week has been particularly difficult. So, please bare with me, but this week’s blog is going to be a bit of a short catharsis session for me.

Tahlula

To start, last Wednesday, our beloved cat Tahlula unexpectedly crossed the rainbow bridge.

I had to rush her to the emergency vet, but it all happened so fast they were unable to do anything for her. We’re not even completely sure what happened. But she was fourteen and had been diagnosed with hyperthyroidism two or three years ago, so it may just have been her time, as difficult as that is to accept.

Her passing has been especially difficult for my wife, who had ‘Lula for four or five years before we met. ‘Lula was her baby.

That’s not to say it hasn’t been difficult for me, too–‘Lula, a somewhat standoffish cat who often preferred to be alone, welcomed me when I met Jessie. I had never had a cat and considered myself squarely in the “dog-person” camp before, but she made me into a “pet-person,” instead.

We don’t have children, and went hard into pet ownership. We have two dogs, two fish tanks, and up until last week, two cats. And despite this home filled with furry companions, her absence is heavy and felt deeply. It was common for both dogs and our other cat, Pickles, to be in the same room with us while ‘Lula stayed upstairs. Now, when this happens, we are keenly aware of the missing presence that should be lounging on the spare bed.

Migraine

As we were beginning to accept the idea that ‘Lula was gone, I was looking forward to my rec league hockey team’s semi-final playoff game on Sunday. Hockey is my greatest stress reliever, and there is no activity I enjoy more. I needed to play to burn off the events of the week.

But as Sunday morning became Sunday afternoon, I felt off. Unsteady. Lightheaded.

It took me a few hours of denying it before I realized what was happening: a migraine was on the way.

I don’t get the most common form of migraines. Instead, I get what are called “vestibular migraines.” Rather than a pounding headache and sensitivity to light and sound, I get extreme vertigo that usually lasts three days. It’s to the point that I have difficulty walking, and just having my eyes open is enough to induce the spins worse than any after-the-club drunkeness I experienced in my younger, wilder days. Thankfully, I tend to only get one a year.

So, I had to let my team know at the last minute I would not be there and they needed to find another goalie. When the puck dropped at 8:00, I was already in bed, hoping I could nip the worst of the vertigo in the bud.

And my team lost in overtime.

The good news is, I did nip it in the bud. I took Monday off from work and crashed out on the couch all day. Lucky for me, the lightheadedness and general “wrong” feeling got bad, but never escalated to full-on vertigo. But it also persisted for a frustratingly long time.

You see, for the last month or so, I’ve been subbing in for another team’s goalie after he was injured. And that team also had a semi-final playoff game, on Tuesday.

Despite lingering unpleasantness, I was determined to play, and by the time I got to the rink I was feeling back to about 95% normal.

And it was good enough, because we won in a shoot-out. The championship game is tonight.

Short Story Challenge 2025

But, the week had one more surprise for me.

If you’re a regular visitor of this blog, you may remember back in January I wrote about how I was participating in the NYC Midnight Short Story Challenge 2025, and that I had been assigned my weakest genre, romance.

When I got out to the parking lot and checked my phone after last night’s game, I was surprised to find the first round results waiting for me. I had completely forgotten when they were coming.

And, unsurprisingly to me, I did not advance to the second round. I have participated in this challenge for three years in a row, and this is the first time I haven’t moved out of the first round.

However, there was a small silver lining: my story earned the third honorable mention spot, which means I got way closer to advancing than I ever expected. It’s a small thing, but given this was one of the first romance stories I’ve ever written, and definitely the first I actually put real effort into, I’ll take it. I choose to think it means that I’m a strong enough writer that even when forced to write well outside my comfort zone, I can create something people enjoy.

A New Week

So, the last few days ended on a relatively high note, and I feel (99%) normal today. The endorphins I get from hockey did their job. But this house still feels oddly empty without ‘Lula. And win or lose tonight, it’s just beer league hockey whose outcome doesn’t really matter–the summer league starts next week, and around we go again.

If you got this far, thanks for letting me rant a bit. We’ll return to our regularly scheduled writer blog topics next week, I promise. Edits for Gas Giant Gambit have been speeding along, and I’m waiting to hear if a short story of mine that has been short-listed will be published or not. Keep your fingers crossed.

With that, I’ll leave you with a few more photos of our dear Tahlula